Jesus, On Balance

This one comes to us via Joe Oxford.

Since back in the day, Jesus supposedly appeared to the meanest of us, the poor and the needy, the ones that everyone else disregarded—including the filthy, unfaithful Samaritans!—I should be so presumptuous as to regard any appearance of Jesus or BVM or Mother Theresa on a building or overpass or potato chip; a tomato slice, a pita or a copper awning to be something Divine.

Anus

Wouldn’t you?

I’d say this picture of the Resurrected Christ to be the dog’s bollocks, but this one is a bitch. I stand corrected: it’s a boy dog! Get Behind Jesus!

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A Grand Outing

Tonight, Bill Maher is set to out any number of gay Republicans who a) are out, socially in DC, and b) have supported anti-gay measures or anti-gay bosses.

Outing is one of those things that’s greatly divisive to the gay community. But I have found that those who oppose any kind of outing tend to fall into two groups:

  1. Those who don’t understand there’s a difference between personal outing and journalistic outing
  2. Those who understand, but fail to understand the difference between privacy and secrecy.

I’m continually surprised at the gay men I know and know of, who are against any kind of outing. But see, I’ve already lost any argument I would make along these lines: By continuing to use the term ‘outing’ in the journalistic sense, I’m already admitting there’s a tacit shame to being gay.

Instead, journalistic outing is merely investigative journalism, resulting in context-relevant reporting. That’s it. And that’s all that Michael Signorile ever did, and it’s all that Bill Maher is doing—or rather will be doing tonight on his show.

When people outed Andrew Sullivan as a BDSM barebacking queen who cruises internet hookup sites in search of anonymous encounters yet publically labels those who do the same as self-loathing and who make us all look bad, well, in my opinion, the real news story is his hypocrisy, not the fact of his behavior. He crawled on the backs of those who were not ashamed of themselves in order to feel better about himself.

Same with Mehlman. Same with Dan Gurley, another ‘barebacker’ who helped push abstinence-only sex-education. Same with Ted “Tina” Haggard (“Feeling Haggard? Smoke Crystal Meth!” —props to Skittles).

And these are also the criteria Maher says he’ll be using tonight on his show.

I hope the liberals and progressives who are against investigative, objective journalism can just keep their mouths shut and let the right imply cohesiveness from it, because I honestly don’t remember any libs getting bent out of shape when Strom Thurmond was exposed as having an affair (and child!) with a black servant.

The GGG (Gay Gordon Gekko’s) over at GayPatriot care more about their wallets than about their rights, so they must be foaming at the mouth over this one.

We’ll see how it plays out. The Repubs in power(ish!) have too much going on to really make it a huge issue, so it’ll be interesting to see if there’s actually a fair debate on it rather than the typical Rapid Rabid Response.

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Anagrammizability

I have a totally useless talent: recognizing certain words or names as being more versatile (giggle) for anagrams than others. Sometimes this also means I can fashion good anagrams out of them, but I often just don’t try.

But here we have the ballad of three big losers: Santorum, Allen and Rumsfeld.

Take those three names and what do you get?

LOST MADMEN SNARL, RUEFUL

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Rats Desert a Sinking Ship

The support scaffolding is folding: CNN reports that Rummy is stepping down.

Update: Dobson Quits Haggard Counseling Team, citing “lack of time”. What? Is he too busy spending time with Jones now that he’s got some openings in his schedule?

Update [2006-11-08:10.54] South Dakota voters killed the state abortion ban!

[Faux] Update [2006-11-08:13.26] Marilyn Musgrave switches to panties WITH crotches in them, offering, “they hurt less when they get all twisted up.”

Update [2006-11-08:17.40] Karl Rove’s “the math”

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I Love America

Now gloat before gloat you gloat start gloat thinking gloat that gloat I’m gloat going gloat to gloat cut gloat into gloat the gloat Republicans gloat right gloat away gloat, let gloat me gloat for gloat now gloat point gloat out gloat that gloat these gloat were gloat CNN.Com’s gloat Top gloat Stories:

Cnntopstories-1

Yes, folks…Democrats taking the House, Dems picking up Senate seats (3 down, 3 to go!), Dems regaining a big pile of governorships, the ballot and divisive social issues…and Britney Spears divorcing.

That trailer park in Alabama: “Ah hate gays! Jesus saves! Axis of Evil! Oooh! Britney dumps K-Fed!”

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Stealing Is Bad

Get out and vote, biotches. We not only need to win this election, we need to win it by enough that even with Republican trickery and fraud we still come out on top.

Remember anti-gay Haggard getting his meth-fueled rocks off while trying to rob you of your liberties. Remember Cheney’s idea of giving someone a facial. Remember how afraid the Republicans have tried to make you: good leaders lead…great leaders make leaders out of their people, and it’s time for at least a good leader.

Remember all the human deaths at our hands in Iraq. Remember the President going to the Hill to plead his case in favor of torture. Remember that the gas prices are low because of the impending election, not because the Republicans are doing a good job keeping the oil companies—hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha..sorry, I couldn’t finish that with a serious face—keeping the oil companies in their place.

Remember that if oil is an addiction for us, then Bush and Cheney were two of the biggest dope-pushers out there and kept us addicted so they could line their own pockets.

Remember. And get them the fuck out of there.

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Prayers for Rain

you shatter me
your grip on me
a hold on me
so dull it kills
you stifle me
infectious sense
of hopelessness and
prayers for rain
i suffocate
i breathe in dirt
and nowhere shines
but desolate
and drab the hours all spent
on killing time again
all waiting for
the rain

you fracture me
your hands on me
a touch so plain
so stale it kills
you strangle me
entangle me
in hopelessness and
prayers for rain
i deteriorate
i live in dirt
and nowhere glows
but drearily and tired
the hours all spent
on killing time again
all waiting for
the rain

Here’s hoping the government gets that long-overdue ecclesiectomy!

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