I have news. Well, I have something I haven’t had in a while: hope.
I finally got my appointment with a pain specialist, who generously spent a solid 2.5 hours with me, explaining the different kinds of pain; the pain pathways; the classes of drugs (systemic and local) that operate on those pathways; the dynamics & equilibrium aspects of blood serotonin; and various pharmacokinetics and interactions of the meds that are typically used to treat pain.
He also did some mechanical tests (walking on toes, on heels, the â€œpolice testâ€ walk) and some musculoskeletal observations.
Bottom line, I showed up to the appointment with the expectation of â€œmore of the sameâ€, because it’s all been the same, it seems, and a script for some sort of pain killer to provide palliative benefits, but nothing more.
What I left with was a lilt in my step and in my head, and the idea that I may be fixable and my pain and my neck problems may diminish enough for me to do the one thing I desperately want to do: be that brainy guy I used to be so I can get my ass back to the work I love.
There are no promises, nor decided-upon treatments just yet, but Hope is Magic, and that makes this feel like an emotional â€œold home weekâ€.
True hope is swift, and flies with swallow’s wings;<br/> Kings it makes gods, and meaner creatures kings.
William Shakespeare<br/> KING RICHARD III, Act 5, Scene 2