In Defense of Senator Larry Craig

The Republicans are so hypocritical and so twisted that they’re utterly lacking in everything but antipathy. How can you look at the Republicans and not want to write them off completely as hypocrites and liars? There is no honor among thieves. There is no friendship or loyalty among the Republicans.

Besides knifing every person who embarrasses them, the Republicans are also gunning again (still!) for marginalizing gay people.

Even Craig! He claims that he’s not gay, “and has never been”. Whaaaa? That’s just his way of reinforcing the utterly wrong notion that homosexuality is just a debilitating layer atop the “true” sexuality of the hetero-. He’s at the end of his tether and still he’s properly mendicant in his role as a Republican doctrinaire.

Ahh, but I return here not to bury Craig, but praise him. Wait, no, that’s not right. Should I be praising Craig’s compatriots for appropriately chastising and abandoning such a hypocrite?

I should, but they’re not being appropriate in the least. From cnn.com:

  • Sen. John McCain, a GOP presidential candidate, called Craig’s case “disgraceful.”
  • “My opinion is that when you plead guilty to a crime, then you shouldn’t serve,” said McCain, of Arizona. “And that’s not a moral stand, that’s not a ‘holier-than-thou,’ it’s just a factual situation.”
  • Another Republican senator, Norm Coleman of Minnesota, said Craig pleaded guilty to “a crime involving conduct unbecoming a senator.”
  • And Rep. Peter Hoekstra, the ranking Republican on the House Intelligence Committee, said Craig should give up his Senate seat.
  • “The voters of Idaho elected Sen. Craig to represent their state, and will decide his future in 2008 should he fail to resign,” the Michigan congressman said in a statement issued by his office. “However, he also represents the Republican Party, and I believe that he should step down, as his conduct throughout this matter has been inappropriate for a U.S. senator.”
  • On Thursday, former Sen. Bill Frist of Tennessee said Craig’s actions, if true, are “despicable.” Frist, a Republican, is a former Senate majority leader.

Well, Senator McCain, last I checked, it doesn’t invalidate your position of Senator to be accused of a crime or even to be guilty of one. The only factual situation is that you’re running for President and like all the other Republicans in the race, you’re gay-bashing and broadsiding in order to make sure the credulous remember your “firm stand” on those nasty evil gays. You really want to be the real man you pretend to be? Start the proceedings to expel him yourself, you gutless bastard.

Senator Coleman: I’m only 43 years old, but honestly, I’ve seen more conduct unbecoming humans coming from the U.S. Legislature than the opposite.

Rep. Hoekstra: why exactly should he surrender his seat? What did Craig do besides use his position as a Senator to reinforce his own closet walls? You all act in self-interest and to say otherwise is bullshit.

Senator Frist: oh please. Next!

What exactly did Craig do? I’ve already addressed his hypocrisy in his behavior as a Senator and human being. Despicable. But no moreso than most Republicans in the Senate.

Craig didn’t suck the cop’s cock. He didn’t unzip and show his own cock. As far as was reported by the stupid-ass airport cop, the cop also didn’t whip it out. In effect, Craig hit on the cop. He made a sexual overture that no one but the two of them even witnessed.

Does Minnesota send female undercover cops to all the meat market bars in the state in attempts to trap sleazeball males who might place a hand on a woman’s shoulder as he tries to get laid? Does Idaho also consider it appropriate to send police officers into straight bars and arrest those men who flirt with women?

Of course they don’t. I’d even hazard a guess that if that cop had walked into that men’s room and realized that an opposite-sex couple were in that last stall there at the end having full-on sex that he’d at most give them a warning and a smirk. It would end there.

When I first heard this whole story, I was hard-pressed to think of anyone who was as small and ugly-souled as Larry Craig because of the hypocrisy of his Senatorial behavior and record. I never judged him based on his sexual behavior. Had he been standing there in the midst of the restroom with his cock out getting head from someone for all to see, then yeah, I could see how that’s inappropriate. But Craig did nothing wrong in that restroom. Nothing at all. Afterwards, his hubris was blatant and ugly, but I can imagine that McCain, Frist, Hoekstra, Coleman and every other Senator have used their name and position to get at the very least small favors. Had Craig been a horny woman alone who snuck into that restroom and hit on the cop, there’s be no arrest, but there probably would have been a couple of orgasms.

No. These people who judge Senator Craig are just as hypocritical—if not moreso—than Craig himself. They’re using him as political fodder. They’re climbing over the backs of the gay community (and not in a good way) in order to prick at the fears and prejudices of the American people.

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UPDATE: Tucker Carlson, famous anus, was on MSNBC talking about—you guessed it—the Larry Craig fiasco. In it, he mentions that he was “bothered” in a restroom and then quite self-congratorily smiles and offers that he bashed the guy’s head against the stall (credit to mediamatters.org for the quicktime clip and transcription):

Notice, too, that Carlson claims that Craig’s being gay is “nobody’s business”. I would agree if Craig hadn’t supported those anti-gay initiatives. Why? Because his orientation would not be germane to any news story. Just like Cheney’s ties to Halliburton would not be newsworthy had he not taken advantage of his political power to line his own (I’m sure very butch) purse. It’s such a simple concept, journalistic outing. It’s been described and justified over and over again. Why do people have such trouble understanding that the right to privacy (or lack thereof in cases of public figures) applies equally to hetero- and homosexuals? Journalists are presenting bias if they fail to report homosexuality of a subject if it’s germane to the story. Period. Too much denial, I guess, from gays and straights alike: straights encounter that “ick” factor, and gays don’t think beyond “well, I wouldn’t want someone to do that to me.

UPDATE #2: Salon.com says some familiar things.

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So, who’s going to suffer because of this whole nightmare? Directly? Craig and the gay community. Indirectly? We all will. All of us. Even those addle-brained townies who hate the gays.

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